nobody likes a prodigy

today as every day we learn to embrace mediocrity; america wasn't exactly built by geniuses, and is run by idiots, and who are we to say american culture isn't good and perfect? what kind of bigots do you take us for? (but as americans we are sworn to simple principles of liberty, charity, amazing progress through the ages: even bigots deserve a shot at happiness. maybe even moreso, because they've had to overcome a serious handicap to get where they are. and who doesn't love the handicapped?)

comfort is king, people, and nothing's more comforting than the view from the middle of the pack. with that in mind we give you several examples of mediocrity you might emulate in your quest for tremendous happiness. write it down, take it into yourself, american, and know that you're being watched over day and night. it's a little scary what you do on the videotapes. call us if you want those back. please call.

we miss you.

mediocrity ho! look, learn goddamnit:

• billings, MT
• the well-meaning american national soccer team
• latin
• your college roommate who only had intercourse once in school and fell immediately in love with her
• whoever was driving the fucking Titanic
• ann arbor, MI
• why do you still bother playing the guitar?
• buying a box of XXL condoms to leave on your coffee table - that is so weird
• put those condoms away, we're eating
• gateway computers
• everyone who ever watched 'american idol' even once
• the confederacy
• elizabethan playwright thomas kyd
• you're a little old to watch 'sailor moon'
• i want my porn back you thieving pervert
• call and let's talk, i promise to be good

probably it's all clear by now. these negative examples will guide you, ameri-beasts. we know what it is you're thinking when you dry-hump the couch; we're thinking it too.

Comments

[aaaaaaa]

i dont get this blog what is this dumb shit

[aaaaaaa]

i dont get this blog what is this dumb shit

[l]

get shit straight, post an up-date
it rhymes!

[cryora]

America was built by geniuses. Benjamin Franklin, for example, and James Madison.

I would say my grandfather was a bigot. As I grew and learned more about the world, I discover how uninformed about many matters he was. However, his bigotry holds strong values, and that, I suppose, is admirable.

What's wrong with Gateway computers? Is it physically impossible for a Gateway computer to be a good one? What about watching American Idol just once.. maybe twice for kicks?

I can't believe I'm reading this crap instead of focusing on college.