even the difficult things should be straightforward for the tremendously organized future warriors of the post-digital era. even the complicated things should be simple. the important thing is to pick a starting point and start there, but commit yourself to journey and achievement. if you stay at the starting point for terribly long you'll end up looking like the one married woman at the bachelorette party - or worse, hitler. you don't want to be hitler, do you?
so here's one of many possible starting points: when you're sitting at the bar - picture it, you're writing in your moleskine about your very creative ideas and the many ways you can convert them into piles of american cash, are you picturing it? can you smell the cologne rolling off the bartender? he wants to pour you another drink, pay attention - you're sitting there, and there's a garbage can just on the other side of the bar. the surface is slick and it slopes slightly inward (toward the bartender). this is so when you vomit up your expensive beer it will pour into the garbage can. ok? we can't make the logistics any clearer than we already have. you vomit into the garbage can later in the night, when you heroically down several shots to impress that sweet bitch in the booth by the window, red-headed (dyed) and probably sleeping with everyone in the bar who isn't you. right now, your only task is to watch things, to get shit straight as regards gravity, precision, control of immediate space, portraiture...
you're not gonna get to sleep with that sweet bitch, i hope you realize.
oh but it's so simple, hold on tightly to your electro-gel anti-gravity designer rubber-poly-grip combination pen and cellular modem - don't drop it into the vomit trash can. you paid so much for that pen, don't you even care about your possessions? you could have purchased your very own haitian child for less than the pen cost you, yuppie.
bars are immensely difficult and deadly. probably best if you just stay home.
anyway if you DO drop that shit into the trash the barman will be happy to fish it out for you, because he's already covered in barf anyhow. turn up the music.
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